A Fairly Sad Tale

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1. The Tearful Tale Of Captain Dan A sinner was old Captain Dan; His wives guv him no rest: He had one wife to East Skiddaw And one to Skiddaw West. Now Ann Eliza was the name Of her at East Skiddaw; She was the most cantankerous Female you ever saw. I don’t know but one crosser-grained, And of this Captain Dan […]...
2. A Tale of Starvation There once was a man whom the gods didn’t love, And a disagreeable man was he. He loathed his neighbours, and his neighbours hated him, And he cursed eternally. He damned the sun, and he damned the stars, And he blasted the winds in the sky. He sent to Hell every green, growing thing, And […]...
3. A Tale of Elsinore A little child stood thinking, sorrowfully and ill at ease, In a forest beneath the branches of the tall pine trees – And his big brown eyes with tears seemed dim, While one soft arm rested on a huge dog close by him. And only four summers had passed o’er his baby head, And, poor […]...
4. A Fairy Tale On winter nights beside the nursery fire We read the fairy tale, while glowing coals Builded its pictures. There before our eyes We saw the vaulted hall of traceried stone Uprear itself, the distant ceiling hung With pendent stalactites like frozen vines; And all along the walls at intervals, Curled upwards into pillars, roses climbed, […]...
5. A Tale of the Miser and the Poet A WIT, transported with Inditing, Unpay’d, unprais’d, yet ever Writing; Who, for all Fights and Fav’rite Friends, Had Poems at his Fingers Ends; For new Events was still providing; Yet now desirous to be riding, He pack’d-up ev’ry Ode and Ditty And in Vacation left the City; So rapt with Figures, and Allusions, With secret […]...
6. An Oath (An Oath wrtitten during the Dawn Meditation) Aiwaz! Confirm my troth with thee! my will inspire With secret sperm of subtle, free, creating Fire! Mould thou my very flesh as Thine, renew my birth In childhood merry as divine, enchenated earth! Dissolve my rapture in Thine own, a sacred slaugther Whereby to capture and atone […]...
7. A Whispered Tale I’d heard fool-heroes brag of where they’d been, With stories of the glories that they’d seen. But you, good simple soldier, seasoned well In woods and posts and crater-lines of hell, Who dodge remembered ‘crumps’ with wry grimace, Endured experience in your queer, kind face, Fatigues and vigils haunting nerve-strained eyes, And both your brothers […]...
8. Floss won't save you from an Abyss Floss won’t save you from an Abyss But a Rope will Notwithstanding a Rope for a Souvenir Is not beautiful But I tell you every step is a Trough And every stop a Well Now will you have the Rope or the Floss? Prices reasonable...
9. FAIRY TALE I can scare children As the Victorians aimed to do Even on an August beach Tell a fairy tale One woven more cruel Than castles turned to sand and Washed into oblivion By the evening tide I can think a tale In sea forests Black haemorrhoid weed Where pebbles become life form Or unfortunates petrified […]...
10. The Chestnut Casts His Flambeaux The chestnut casts his flambeaux, and the flowers Stream from the hawthorn on the wind away, The doors clap to, the pane is blind with showers. Pass me the can, lad; there’s an end of May. There’s one spoilt spring to scant our mortal lot, One season ruined of your little store. May will be […]...
11. Kisses Sweet, can I sing you the song of your kisses? How soft is this one, how subtle this is, How fluttering swift as a bird’s kiss that is, As a bird that taps at a leafy lattice; How this one clings and how that uncloses From bud to flower in the way of roses; And […]...
12. The Confessor, a Sanctified Tale When SUPERSTITION rul’d the land And Priestcraft shackled Reason, At GODSTOW dwelt a goodly band, Grey monks they were, and but to say They were not always giv’n to pray, Would have been construed Treason. Yet some did scoff, and some believ’d That sinners were themselves deceiv’d; And taking Monks for more than men They […]...
13. Prosopopoia: or Mother Hubbard's Tale By that he ended had his ghostly sermon, The fox was well induc’d to be a parson, And of the priest eftsoons gan to inquire, How to a benefice he might aspire. “Marry, there” (said the priest) “is art indeed: Much good deep learning one thereout may read; For that the ground-work is, and end […]...
14. At Fontainebleau IT was a day of sun and rain, Uncertain as a child’s swift moods; And I shall never spend again So blithe a day among the woods. Was it because the Gods were pleased That they were awful in our eyes, Whom we in very deed appeased With barley-cakes of sacrifice? The forest knew her […]...
15. MISCHIEVOUS JOY AS a butterfly renew’d, When in life I breath’d my last, To the spots my flight I wing, Scenes of heav’nly rapture past, Over meadows, to the spring, Round the hill, and through the wood. Soon a tender pair I spy, And I look down from my seat On the beauteous maiden’s head When embodied […]...
16. A Tale of Christmas Eve ‘Twas Christmastide in Germany, And in the year of 1850, And in the city of Berlin, which is most beautiful to the eye; A poor boy was heard calling out to passers-by. “Who’ll buy my pretty figures,” loudly he did cry, Plaster of Paris figures, but no one inclined to buy; His clothes were thin […]...
17. The Reeve's Tale THE PROLOGUE. WHEN folk had laughed all at this nice case Of Absolon and Hendy Nicholas, Diverse folk diversely they said, But for the more part they laugh’d and play’d;* *were diverted And at this tale I saw no man him grieve, But it were only Osewold the Reeve. Because he was of carpenteres craft, […]...
18. The Tale of the Tiger-Tree A Fantasy, dedicated to the little poet Alice Oliver Henderson, ten years old. The Fantasy shows how tiger-hearts are the cause of war in all ages. It shows how the mammoth forces may be either friends or enemies of the struggle for peace. It shows how the dream of peace is unconquerable and eternal. I […]...
19. The Glove – A Tale Before his lion-court, Impatient for the sport, King Francis sat one day; The peers of his realm sat around, And in balcony high from the ground Sat the ladies in beauteous array. And when with his finger he beckoned, The gate opened wide in a second, And in, with deliberate tread, Enters a lion dread, […]...
20. The Friar's Tale THE PROLOGUE. This worthy limitour, this noble Frere, He made always a manner louring cheer* *countenance Upon the Sompnour; but for honesty* *courtesy No villain word as yet to him spake he: But at the last he said unto the Wife: “Dame,” quoth he, “God give you right good life, Ye have here touched, all […]...
21. The Sompnour's Tale THE PROLOGUE. The Sompnour in his stirrups high he stood, Upon this Friar his hearte was so wood,* *furious That like an aspen leaf he quoke* for ire: *quaked, trembled “Lordings,” quoth he, “but one thing I desire; I you beseech, that of your courtesy, Since ye have heard this false Friar lie, As suffer […]...
22. To the Unknown Goddess Will you conquer my heart with your beauty; my sould going out from afar? Shall I fall to your hand as a victim of crafty and cautions shikar? Have I met you and passed you already, unknowing, unthinking and blind? Shall I meet you next session at Simla, O sweetest and best of your kind? […]...
23. A Winter's Tale Yesterday the fields were only grey with scattered snow, And now the longest grass-leaves hardly emerge; Yet her deep footsteps mark the snow, and go On towards the pines at the hills’ white verge. I cannot see her, since the mist’s white scarf Obscures the dark wood and the dull orange sky; But she’s waiting, […]...
24. The Wife of Bath's Tale THE PROLOGUE. 1 Experience, though none authority* *authoritative texts Were in this world, is right enough for me To speak of woe that is in marriage: For, lordings, since I twelve year was of age, (Thanked be God that *is etern on live),* *lives eternally* Husbands at the church door have I had five,2 For […]...
25. New Farm Tractor The rear axles hold the kick of twenty Missouri jackasses. It is in the records of the patent office and the ads there is twenty horse power pull here. The farm boy says hello to you instead of twenty mules-he sings to you instead of ten span of mules. A bucket of oil and a […]...
26. 339. Song-O for ane an' twenty, Tam Chorus.-An’ O for ane an’ twenty, Tam! And hey, sweet ane an’ twenty, Tam! I’ll learn my kin a rattlin’ sang, An’ I saw ane an’ twenty, Tam. THEY snool me sair, and haud me down, An’ gar me look like bluntie, Tam; But three short years will soon wheel roun’, An’ then comes ane […]...
27. The Trumpeter, an Old English Tale It was in the days of a gay British King (In the old fashion’d custom of merry-making) The Palace of Woodstock with revels did ring, While they sang and carous’d one and all: For the monarch a plentiful treasury had, And his Courtiers were pleas’d, and no visage was sad, And the knavish and foolish […]...
28. When I Was One-and-Twenty When I was one-and-twenty I heard a wise man say, “Give crowns and pounds and guineas But not your heart away; Give pearls away and rubies But keep your fancy free.” But I was one-and-twenty, No use to talk to me. When I was one-and-twenty I heard him say again, “The heart out of the […]...
29. Since so Ye Please Since so ye please to hear me plain, And that ye do rejoice my smart, Me list no lenger to remain To such as be so overthwart. But cursed be that cruel heart Which hath procur’d a careless mind For me and mine unfeigned smart, And forceth me such faults to find. More than too […]...
30. The Man of Law's Tale THE PROLOGUE. Our Hoste saw well that the brighte sun Th’ arc of his artificial day had run The fourthe part, and half an houre more; And, though he were not deep expert in lore, He wist it was the eight-and-twenty day Of April, that is messenger to May; And saw well that the shadow […]...
31. The Knight's Tale WHILOM*, as olde stories tellen us, *formerly There was a duke that highte* Theseus. *was called Of Athens he was lord and governor, And in his time such a conqueror That greater was there none under the sun. Full many a riche country had he won. What with his wisdom and his chivalry, He conquer’d […]...
32. The Fortune-Teller, a Gypsy Tale LUBIN and KATE, as gossips tell, Were Lovers many a day; LUBIN the damsel lov’d so well, That folks pretend to say The silly, simple, doting Lad, Was little less than loving mad: A malady not known of late Among the little-loving Great! KATE liked the youth; but woman-kind Are sometimes giv’n to range. And […]...
33. Enoch Dunlap How many times, during the twenty years I was your leader, friends of Spoon River, Did you neglect the convention and caucus, And leave the burden on my hands Of guarding and saving the people’s cause? Sometimes because you were ill; Or your grandmother was ill; Or you drank too much and fell asleep; Or […]...
34. The Miller's Tale THE PROLOGUE. When that the Knight had thus his tale told In all the rout was neither young nor old, That he not said it was a noble story, And worthy to be *drawen to memory*; *recorded* And *namely the gentles* every one. *especially the gentlefolk* Our Host then laugh’d and swore, “So may I […]...
35. The Granny Grey, a Love Tale DAME DOWSON, was a granny grey, Who, three score years and ten, Had pass’d her busy hours away, In talking of the Men! They were her theme, at home, abroad, At wake, and by the winter fire, Whether it froze, or blew, or thaw’d, In sunshine or in shade, her ire Was never calm’d; for […]...
36. Eugene Carman Rhodes’ slave! Selling shoes and gingham, Flour and bacon, overalls, clothing, all day long For fourteen hours a day for three hundred and thirteen days For more than twenty years. Saying “Yes’m” and “Yes, sir”, and “Thank you” A thousand times a day, and all for fifty dollars a month. Living in this stinking room […]...
37. The Sausage Candidate-A Tale of the Elections Our fathers, brave men were and strong, And whisky was their daily liquor; They used to move the world along In better style than now and quicker. Elections then were sport, you bet! A trifle rough, there’s no denying When two opposing factions met The skin and hair were always flying. When “cabbage-trees” could still […]...
38. A Tale of Two Cities Where the sober-colored cultivator smiles On his byles; Where the cholera, the cyclone, and the crow Come and go; Where the merchant deals in indigo and tea, Hides and ghi; Where the Babu drops inflammatory hints In his prints; Stands a City Charnock chose it packed away Near a Bay By the Sewage rendered fetid, […]...
39. COPTIC SONG LEAVE we the pedants to quarrel and strive, Rigid and cautious the teachers to be! All of the wisest men e’er seen alive Smile, nod, and join in the chorus with me: “Vain ’tis to wait till the dolt grows less silly! Play then the fool with the fool, willy-nilly, Children of wisdom, remember the […]...
40. ON HIMSELF A wearied pilgrim I have wander’d here, Twice five-and-twenty, bate me but one year; Long I have lasted in this world; ’tis true But yet those years that I have lived, but few. Who by his gray hairs doth his lustres tell, Lives not those years, but he that lives them well: One man has […]...