Gilhooley's Estate

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1. The Key Of The Street “Miss Rosemary,” I dourly said, “Our balance verges on the red, We must cut down our overhead. One of the staff will have to go. There’s Mister Jones, he’s mighty slow, Although he does his best, I know. “A deer old man; I like him well, But age, alas! will always tell. Miss Rosemary, please […]...
2. Of the Mean and Sure Estate My mother’s maids, when they did sew and spin, They sang sometime a song of the field mouse, That, for because her livelood was but thin, Would needs go seek her townish sister’s house. She thought herself endurèd too much pain; The stormy blasts her cave so sore did souse That when the furrows swimmèd […]...
3. Real Estate News ARMOUR AVENUE was the name of this street and door signs on empty houses read “The Silver Dollar,” “Swede Annie” and the Christian names of madams such as “Myrtle” and “Jenny.” Scrap iron, rags and bottles fill the front rooms hither and yon and signs in Yiddish say Abe Kaplan & Co. are running junk […]...
4. The Sun Was Slumbering in the West The sun was slumbering in the West, My daily labors past; On Anna’s soft and gentle breast My head reclined at last; The darkness closed around, so dear To fond congenial souls, And thus she murmur’d at my ear, “My love, we’re out of coals! “That Mister Bond has call’d again, Insisting on his rent; […]...
5. A paraphrase Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name; Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth, in Heaven the same; Give us this day our daily bread, and may our debts to heaven As we our earthly debts forgive by Thee be all forgiven; When tempted or by evil vexed, restore Thou […]...
6. Ad Martialem GO(D) knows, my Martial, if we two could be To enjoy our days set wholly free; To the true life together bend our mind, And take a furlough from the falser kind. No rich saloon, nor palace of the great, Nor suit at law should trouble our estate; On no vainglorious statues should we look, […]...
7. You said that I "was Great" one Day You said that I “was Great” one Day Then “Great” it be if that please Thee Or Small or any size at all Nay I’m the size suit Thee Tall like the Stag would that? Or lower like the Wren Or other heights of Other Ones I’ve seen? Tell which it’s dull to guess And […]...
8. Jones's Porvate Argyment That air same Jones, which lived in Jones, He had this pint about him: He’d swear with a hundred sighs and groans, That farmers MUST stop gittin’ loans, And git along without ’em: That bankers, warehousemen, and sich Was fatt’nin’ on the planter, And Tennessy was rotten-rich A-raisin’ meat and corn, all which Draw’d money […]...
9. Bones Said Mr. Smith, “I really cannot Tell you, Dr. Jones- The most peculiar pain I’m in- I think it’s in my bones.” Said Dr. Jones, “Oh, Mr. Smith, That’s nothing. Without doubt We have a simple cure for that; It is to take them out.” He laid forthwith poor Mr. Smith Close-clamped upon the table, […]...
10. The Cobbler WE’RE told, that once a cobbler, BLASE by name; A wife had got, whose charms so high in fame; But as it happened, that their cash was spent, The honest couple to a neighbour went, A corn-factor by trade, not overwise To whom they stated facts without disguise; And begged, with falt’ring voice denoting care, […]...
11. Buffalo Bill BOY heart of Johnny Jones-aching to-day? Aching, and Buffalo Bill in town? Buffalo Bill and ponies, cowboys, Indians? Some of us know All about it, Johnny Jones. Buffalo Bill is a slanting look of the eyes, A slanting look under a hat on a horse. He sits on a horse and a passing look is […]...
12. Redemption Having been tenant long to a rich lord, Not thriving, I resolved to be bold, And make a suit unto him, to afford A new small-rented lease, and cancel the old. In heaven at his manor I him sought; They told me there that he was lately gone About some land, which he had dearly […]...
13. The Sausage Candidate-A Tale of the Elections Our fathers, brave men were and strong, And whisky was their daily liquor; They used to move the world along In better style than now and quicker. Elections then were sport, you bet! A trifle rough, there’s no denying When two opposing factions met The skin and hair were always flying. When “cabbage-trees” could still […]...
14. Lines in Praise of Mr. J. Graham Henderson, Hawick Success to Mr J. Graham Henderson, who is a good man, And to gainsay it there’s few people can, I say so from my own experience, And experience is a great defence. He is a good man, I venture to say, Which I declare to the world without dismay, Because he’s given me a suit […]...
15. About My Poetry I have no silver-saddled horse to ride, No inheritance to live on, Neither riches no real-estate A pot of honey is all I own. A pot of honey red as fire! My honey is my everything. I guard My riches and my real-estate my honey pot, I mean From pests of every species, Brother, just […]...
16. Dulcis Memoria Long, long ago I heard a little song, (Ah, was it long ago, or yesterday?) So lowly, slowly wound the tune along, That far into my heart it found the way: A melody consoling and endearing; And still, in silent hours, I’m often hearing The small, sweet song that does not die away. Long, long […]...
17. The Water-Fall 1 With what deep murmurs through time’s silent stealth 2 Doth thy transparent, cool, and wat’ry wealth 3 Here flowing fall, 4 And chide, and call, 5 As if his liquid, loose retinue stay’d 6 Ling’ring, and were of this steep place afraid; 7 The common pass 8 Where, clear as glass, 9 All must […]...
18. Thar's More In the Man Than Thar Is In The Land I knowed a man, which he lived in Jones, Which Jones is a county of red hills and stones, And he lived pretty much by gittin’ of loans, And his mules was nuthin’ but skin and bones, And his hogs was flat as his corn-bread pones, And he had ’bout a thousand acres o’ land. […]...
19. Old I have seen peoples come and go Alike the Ocean’d ebb and flow; I have seen kingdoms rise and fall Like springtime shadows on a wall. I have seen houses rendered great That grew from life’s debased estate, And all, all, all is change I see, So, dearest God, take me, take me....
20. Longevity Said Brown: ‘I can’t afford to die For I have bought annuity, And every day of living I Have money coming in to me: While others toil to make their bread I make mine by not being dead.’ Said Jones: ‘I can’t afford to die, For I have books and books to write. I do […]...
21. A Code of Morals Now Jones had left his new-wed bride to keep his house in order, And hied away to the Hurrum Hills above the Afghan border, To sit on a rock with a heliograph; but ere he left he taught His wife the working of the Code that sets the miles at naught. And Love had made […]...
22. Tom Collins Who never drinks and never bets, But loves his wife and pays his debts And feels content with what he gets? Tom Collins. Who has the utmost confidence That all the banks now in suspense Will meet their paper three years hence? Tom Collins. Who reads the Herald leaders through, And takes the Evening News […]...
23. Drinking Song, On the Excellence of Burgundy Wine My jolly fat host with your face all a-grin, Come, open the door to us, let us come in. A score of stout fellows who think it no sin If they toast till they’re hoarse, and drink till they spin, Hoofed it amain Rain or no rain, To crack your old jokes, and your bottle […]...
24. Bustopher Jones: The Cat About Town Bustopher Jones is not skin and bones In fact, he’s remarkably fat. He doesn’t haunt pubs he has eight or nine clubs, For he’s the St. James’s Street Cat! He’s the Cat we all greet as he walks down the street In his coat of fastidious black: No commonplace mousers have such well-cut trousers Or […]...
25. Dear Heart, Why Will You Use Me So? Dear heart, why will you use me so? Dear eyes that gently me upbraid, Still are you beautiful – but O, How is your beauty raimented! Through the clear mirror of your eyes, Through the soft sigh of kiss to kiss, Desolate winds assail with cries The shadowy garden where love is. And soon shall […]...
26. SIR CURT'S WEDDING-JOURNEY WITH a bridegroom’s joyous bearing, Mounts Sir Curt his noble beast, To his mistress’ home repairing, There to hold his wedding feast; When a threatening foe advances From a desert, rocky spot; For the fray they couch their lances, Not delaying, speaking not. Long the doubtful fight continues, Victory then for Curt declares; Conqueror, though […]...
27. The Price of Peace Peace without Justice is a low estate, A coward cringing to an iron Fate! But Peace through Justice is the great ideal, We’ll pay the price of war to make it real....
28. AN EPITAPH UPON A CHILD Virgins promised when I died, That they would each primrose-tide Duly, morn and evening, come, And with flowers dress my tomb. Having promised, pay your debts Maids, and here strew violets....
29. My country need not change her gown My country need not change her gown, Her triple suit as sweet As when ’twas cut at Lexington, And first pronounced “a fit.” Great Britain disapproves, “the stars”; Disparagement discreet, There’s something in their attitude That taunts her bayonet....
30. Mulligan's Mare Oh, Mulligan’s bar was the deuce of a place To drink, and to fight, and to gamble and race; The height of choice spirits from near and from far Were all concentrated on Mulligan’s bar. There was “Jerry the Swell”, and the jockey-boy Ned, “Dog-bite-me” so called from the shape of his head And a […]...
31. Psalm XXXII: Happy the Man Happy the man to whom his God No more imputes his sin, But, washed in the Redeemer’s blood, Hath made his garments clean. Happy beyond expression he Who debts are thus discharged; And from the guilty bondage free, He feels his soul enlarged. His spirit hates deceit and lies, His words are all sincere; He […]...
32. Was It You? “Hullo, young Jones! with your tie so gay And your pen behind your ear; Will you mark my cheque in the usual way? For I’m overdrawn, I fear.” Then you look at me in a manner bland, As you turn your ledger’s leaves, And you hand it back with a soft white hand, And the […]...
33. When that I was and a little tiny boy When that I was and a little tiny boy, With hey, ho, the wind and the rain, A foolish thing was but a toy, For the rain it raineth every day. But when I came to man’s estate, With hey, ho, . . . ‘Gainst knaves and thieves men shut their gate For the rain, […]...
34. The Courtship of the Yonghy-Bonghy-Bo I On the Coast of Coromandel Where the early pumpkins blow, In the middle of the woods Lived the Yonghy-Bonghy-BС‚. Two old chairs, and half a candle, One old jug without a handle, These were all his worldly goods: In the middle of the woods, These were all the worldly goods, Of the Yonghy-Bonghy-BС‚, Of […]...
35. Horace to Melpomene Lofty and enduring is the monument I’ve reared, Come, tempests, with your bitterness assailing; And thou, corrosive blasts of time, by all things mortal feared, Thy buffets and thy rage are unavailing! I shall not altogether die; by far my greater part Shall mock man’s common fate in realms infernal; My works shall live as […]...
36. Size and Tears When on the sandy shore I sit, Beside the salt sea-wave, And fall into a weeping fit Because I dare not shave – A little whisper at my ear Enquires the reason of my fear. I answer “If that ruffian Jones Should recognise me here, He’d bellow out my name in tones Offensive to the […]...
37. ON THE Dutchess of Grafton Under the Name of Alinda A SONG. I. TH’ambitious Eye that seeks alone, Where Beauties Wonders most are shown; Of all that bounteous Heaven displays, Let him on bright Alinda gaze; And in her high Example see, All can admir’d, or wisht-for, be! II. An unmatch’t Form, Mind like endow’d, Estate, and Title great and proud; A Charge Heaven dares […]...
38. Forget Not Yet Forget not yet the tried intent Of such a truth as I have meant My great travail so gladly spent Forget not yet. Forget not yet when first began The weary life ye knew, since whan The suit, the service, none tell can, Forget not yet. Forget not yet the great assays, The cruel wrongs, […]...
39. The Ballad of Cockatoo Dock Of all the docks upon the blue There was no dockyard, old or new, To touch the dock at Cockatoo. Of all the ministerial clan There was no nicer, worthier man Than Admiral O’Sullivan. Of course, we mean E. W. O’Sullivan, the hero who Controlled the dock at Cockatoo. To workmen he explained his views […]...
40. 123. Lines to an Old Sweetheart ONCE fondly lov’d, and still remember’d dear, Sweet early object of my youthful vows, Accept this mark of friendship, warm, sincere, Friendship! ’tis all cold duty now allows. And when you read the simple artless rhymes, One friendly sigh for him-he asks no more, Who, distant, burns in flaming torrid climes, Or haply lies beneath […]...