One of the Down and Out that’s me. Stare at me well, ay, stare!
Stare and shrink say! you wouldn’t think that I was a millionaire.
Look at my face, it’s crimped and gouged one of them death-mask things;
Don’t seem the sort of man, do I, as might be the pal of kings?
Slouching along in smelly rags, a bleary-eyed, no-good bum;
A knight of the hollow needle, pard, spewed from the sodden slum.
Look me all over from head to foot; how much would you think I was worth?
A dollar? a dime? a nickel? Why, I’m the wealthest man on earth.
No, don’t you think that I’m off my base. You’ll sing a different tune
If only you’ll let me spin my yarn. Come over to this saloon;
Wet my throat it’s as dry as chalk, and seeing as how it’s you,
I’ll tell the tale of a Northern trail, and so help me God, it’s true.
I’ll tell of the howling wilderness and the haggard Arctic heights,
Of a reckless vow that I made, and how I staked the Northern Lights.