331. Epigram at Brownhill Inn

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1. The Landlady This is the lair of the landlady She is A raw voice Loose in the rooms beneath me. The continuous henyard Squabble going on below Thought in this house like The bicker of blood through the head. She is everywhere, intrusive as the smells That bulge in under my doorsill; She presides over my Meagre […]...
2. Skin Obedient daily dress, You cannot always keep That unfakable young surface. You must learn your lines – Anger, amusement, sleep; Those few forbidding signs Of the continuous coarse Sand-laden wind, time; You must thicken, work loose Into an old bag Carrying a soiled name. Parch then; be roughened; sag; And pardon me, that I Could […]...
3. 160. Epigram at RoslinInn MY blessings on ye, honest wife! I ne’er was here before; Ye’ve wealth o’ gear for spoon and knife- Heart could not wish for more. Heav’n keep you clear o’ sturt and strife, Till far ayont fourscore, And while I toddle on thro’ life, I’ll ne’er gae by your door!...
4. 49. Epigram on the said Occasion O DEATH, had’st thou but spar’d his life, Whom we this day lament, We freely wad exchanged the wife, And a’ been weel content. Ev’n as he is, cauld in his graff, The swap we yet will do’t; Tak thou the carlin’s carcase aff, Thou’se get the saul o’boot....
5. 161. Epigram Addressed to an Artist DEAR -, I’ll gie ye some advice, You’ll tak it no uncivil: You shouldna paint at angels mair, But try and paint the devil. To paint an Angel’s kittle wark, Wi’ Nick, there’s little danger: You’ll easy draw a lang-kent face, But no sae weel a stranger.-R. B....
6. Ad Invasions Advertisements, they’ve trashed the web, Somehow they’ve gotten into bed With common sense; ubiquitous And so intense, insistent As to cause offense, Intrusive and quite truculent, I would they should all go away. [Your Ad Here] But like the course of politics A stronger force reserves its place, Creates a vacuum in the space It […]...
7. 441. Complimentary Epigram to Mrs. Riddell “PRAISE Woman still,” his lordship roars, “Deserv’d or not, no matter?” But thee, whom all my soul adores, Ev’n Flattery cannot flatter: Maria, all my thought and dream, Inspires my vocal shell; The more I praise my lovely theme, The more the truth I tell....
8. 387. Epigram on Miss Fontenelle SWEET naïveté of feature, Simple, wild, enchanting elf, Not to thee, but thanks to Nature, Thou art acting but thyself. Wert thou awkward, stiff, affected, Spurning Nature, torturing art; Loves and Graces all rejected, Then indeed thou’d’st act a part....
9. 409. Epigram-The Raptures of Folly THOU greybeard, old Wisdom! may boast of thy treasures; Give me with young Folly to live; I grant thee thy calm-blooded, time-settled pleasures, But Folly has raptures to give....
10. 135. Epigram on Rough Roads I’M now arrived-thanks to the gods!- Thro’ pathways rough and muddy, A certain sign that makin roads Is no this people’s study: Altho’ Im not wi’ Scripture cram’d, I’m sure the Bible says That heedless sinners shall be damn’d, Unless they mend their ways....
11. 481. Epigram on Andrew Turner IN se’enteen hunder’n forty-nine, The deil gat stuff to mak a swine, An’ coost it in a corner; But wilily he chang’d his plan, An’ shap’d it something like a man, An’ ca’d it Andrew Turner....
12. 423. Epigram on the Laird of Laggan WHEN Morine, deceas’d, to the Devil went down, ВЂ™Twas nothing would serve him but Satan’s own crown; ВЂњThy fool’s head, ” quoth Satan, “that crown shall wear never, I grant thou’rt as wicked, but not quite so clever. ”...
13. Tonight I Can Write Tonight I can write the saddest lines. Write, for example, ‘The night is starry And the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.’ The night wind revolves in the sky and sings. Tonight I can write the saddest lines. I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too. Through nights like this one I […]...
14. 452. Epigram pinned to Mrs. Riddell's carriage IF you rattle along like your Mistress’ tongue, Your speed will outrival the dart; But a fly for your load, you’ll break down on the road, If your stuff be as rotten’s her heart....
15. 410. Epigram-Kirk and State Excisemen YE men of wit and wealth, why all this sneering ‘Gainst poor Excisemen? Give the cause a hearing: What are your Landlord’s rent-rolls?-Taxing ledgers! What Premiers?-What ev’n Monarchs?-Mighty Gaugers! Nay, what are Priests? (those seeming godly wise-men,) What are they, pray, but Spiritual Excisemen!...
16. 475. Epigram on a Country Laird (Cardoness) BLESS Jesus Christ, O Cardonessp, With grateful, lifted eyes, Who taught that not the soul alone, But body too shall rise; For had He said “the soul alone From death I will deliver,” Alas, alas! O Cardoness, Then hadst thou lain for ever....
17. 279. Epigram on Francis Grose the Antiquary THE DEVIL got notice that Grose was a-dying So whip! at the summons, old Satan came flying; But when he approached where poor Francis lay moaning, And saw each bed-post with its burthen a-groaning, Astonish’d, confounded, cries Satan-“By G-, I’ll want him, ere I take such a damnable load!”...
18. 404. Epigram-The True Loyal Natives YE true “Loyal Natives” attend to my song In uproar and riot rejoice the night long; From Envy and Hatred your corps is exempt, But where is your shield from the darts of Contempt!...
19. Epigram OH, be not led away, Lured by the colour of the sun-rich day. The gay romance of song Unto the spirit life doth not belong: Though far-between the hours In which the Master of Angelic powers Lightens the dusk within The holy of holies, be it thine to win Rare vistas of white light, Half-parted […]...
20. First EPIGRAM. (Upon being Contented with a Little) WE deem them moderate, but Enough implore, What barely will suffice, and ask no more: Who say, (O Jove) a competency give, Neither in Luxury, or Want we’d live. But what is that, which these Enough do call? If both the Indies unto some should fall, Such Wealth would yet Enough but onely be, And […]...
21. The Second EPIGRAM. (On BILLINDA) WAnton Bellinda loudly does complain, I’ve chang’d my Love of late into disdain: Calls me unconstant, cause I now adore The chast Marcella, that lov’d her before. Sin or Dishonour, me as well may blame, That I repent, or do avoid a shame....
22. The Third Epigram. (On an ATHEIST) POsthumus boasts he does not Thunder fear, And for this cause would Innocent appear; That in his Soul no Terrour he does feel, At threatn’d Vultures, or Ixion’s Wheel, Which fright the Guilty: But when Fabius told What Acts ‘gainst Murder lately were enrol’d, ‘Gainst Incest, Rapine, straight upon the Tale His Colour chang’d, and […]...
23. The Argument Said Jock McBrown to Tam McSmith, “A little bet I’m game to take on, That I can scotch this Shakespeare myth And prove Will just a stoodge for Bacon.” Said Tam McSmith to Jock McBrown, “Ye gyke, I canna let ye rave on. See here, I put a shilling down: My betting’s on the Bard […]...
24. The Fourth EPIGRAM. (On GALLA) NOw liquid Streams by the fierce Gold do grow As solid as the Rocks from whence they flow; Now Tibers Banks with Ice united meet, And it’s firm Stream may well be term’d its Street; Now Vot’ries ‘fore the Shrines like Statues show, And scarce the Men from Images we know; Now Winters Palsey seizes […]...
25. After an Epigram of Clement Marot The lad I was I longer now Nor am nor shall be evermore. Spring’s lovely blossoms from my brow Have shed their petals on the floor. Thou, Love, hast been my lord, thy shrine Above all gods’ best served by me. Dear Love, could life again be mine How bettered should that service be!...
26. On Being Challenged to Write an Epigram in the Manner of Herrick To Griggs, that learned man, in many a bygone session, His kids were his delight, and physics his profession; Now Griggs, grown old and glum, and less intent on knowledge, Physics himself at home, and sends his kids to college....
27. John Horace Burleson I won the prize essay at school Here in the village, And published a novel before I was twenty-five. I went to the city for themes and to enrich my art; There married the banker’s daughter, And later became president of the bank- Always looking forward to some leisure To write an epic novel of […]...
28. You love the Lord you cannot see You love the Lord you cannot see You write Him every day A little note when you awake And further in the Day. An Ample Letter How you miss And would delight to see But then His House is but a Step And Mine’s in Heaven You see....
29. A Large Number Four billion people on this earth, But my imagination is the way it’s always been: Bad with large numbers. It is still moved by particularity. It flits about the darkness like a flashlight beam, Disclosing only random faces, While the rest go blindly by, Unthought of, unpitied. Not even a Dante could have stopped that. […]...
30. Unlyric Love Song It is time to give that-of-myself which I could not at first: To offer you now at last my least and my worst: Minor, absurd preserves, The shell’s end-curves, A document kept at the back of a drawer, A tin hidden under the floor, Recalcitrant prides and hesitations: To pile them carefully in a desparate […]...
31. Robbed by Death but that was easy Robbed by Death but that was easy To the failing Eye I could hold the latest Glowing Robbed by Liberty For Her Jugular Defences This, too, I endured Hint of Glory it afforded For the Brave Beloved Fraud of Distance Fraud of Danger, Fraud of Death to bear It is Bounty to Suspense’s Vague Calamity […]...
32. Sonnet XLIX: Thou Leaden Brain Thou leaden brain, which censur’st what I write, And say’st my lines be dull and do not move, I marvel not thou feel’st not my delight, Which never felt’st my fiery touch of love. But thou, whose pen hath like a pack-horse serv’d, Whose stomach unto gall hath turn’d thy food, Whose senses, like poor […]...
33. Sonnet 13 XIII To Mr. H. Lawes, on his Aires. Harry whose tuneful and well measur’d Song First taught our English Musick how to span Words with just note and accent, not to scan With Midas Ears, committing short and long; Thy worth and skill exempts thee from the throng, With praise enough for Envy to look […]...
34. The Red Blaze is the Morning The Red Blaze is the Morning The Violet is Noon The Yellow Day is falling And after that is none But Miles of Sparks at Evening Reveal the Width that burned The Territory Argent that Never yet consumed...
35. Mowgli's Song Against People I will let loose against you the fleet-footed vines I will call in the Jungle to stamp out your lines! The roofs shall fade before it, The house-beams shall fall; And the Karela,. the bitter Karela, Shall cover it all! In the gates of these your councils my people shall sing. In the doors of […]...
36. 390. Song-A Health to them that's awa HERE’S a health to them that’s awa, Here’s a health to them that’s awa; And wha winna wish gude luck to our cause, May never gude luck be their fa’! It’s gude to be merry and wise, It’s gude to be honest and true; It’s gude to support Caledonia’s cause, And bide by the buff […]...
37. At leisure is the Soul At leisure is the Soul That gets a Staggering Blow The Width of Life before it spreads Without a thing to do It begs you give it Work But just the placing Pins Or humblest Patchwork Children do To Help its Vacant Hands...
38. Betrayal If a man says half himself in the light, adroit Way a tune shakes into equilibrium, Or approximates to a note that never comes: Says half himself in the way two pencil-lines Flow to each other and softly separate, In the resolute way plane lifts and leaps from plane: Who knows what intimacies our eyes […]...
39. How many schemes may die How many schemes may die In one short Afternoon Entirely unknown To those they most concern The man that was not lost Because by accident He varied by a Ribbon’s width From his accustomed route The Love that would not try Because beside the Door It must be competitions Some unsuspecting Horse was tied Surveying […]...
40. Boon Soul Behold! I’m old; my hair is white; My eighty years are in the offing, And sitting by the fire to-night I sip a grog to ease my coughing. It’s true I’m raucous as a rook, But feeling bibulously “bardy,” These lines I’m scribbling in a book: The verse complete of Thomas Hardy. Although to-day he’s […]...