The Guppy
Whales have calves, Cats have kittens, Bears have cubs, Bats have bittens, Swans have cygnets, Seals have puppies, But guppies just have little guppies.
If He Were Alive Today, Mayhap, Mr. Morgan Would Sit on the Midget's Lap
“Beep-beep. BANKERS TRUST AUTOMOBILE LOAN You’ll find a banker at Bankers Trust” Advertisement in N. Y. Times When comes my second childhood, As to all men it must, I want to be a banker
The Chipmunk
My friends all know that I am shy, But the chipmunk is twice and shy and I. He moves with flickering indecision Like stripes across the television. He’s like the shadow of a cloud,
The Sniffle
In spite of her sniffle Isabel’s chiffle. Some girls with a sniffle Would be weepy and tiffle; They would look awful, Like a rained-on waffle, But Isabel’s chiffle In spite of her sniffle. Her
Lines Indited With All The Depravity Of Poverty
One way to be very happy is to be very rich For then you can buy orchids by the quire and bacon by the flitch. And yet at the same time People don’t mind
The Joyous Malingerer
Who is the happy husband? Why, indeed, ‘Tis he who’s useless in the time of need; Who, asked to unclasp a bracelet or a neckless, Contrives to be utterly futile, fumbling, feckless, Or when
The People Upstairs
The people upstairs all practise ballet Their living room is a bowling alley Their bedroom is full of conducted tours. Their radio is louder than yours, They celebrate week-ends all the week. When they
The Sunset Years of Samuel Shy
Master I may be, But not of my fate. Now come the kisses, too many too late. Tell me, O Parcae, For fain would I know, Where were these kisses three decades ago? Girls
The Tale of Custard the Dragon
Belinda lived in a little white house, With a little black kitten and a little gray mouse, And a little yellow dog and a little red wagon, And a realio, trulio, little pet dragon.
The Hippopotamus
Behold the hippopotamus! We laugh at how he looks to us, And yet in moments dank and grim, I wonder how we look to him. Peace, peace, thou hippopotamus! We really look all right
Just Keep Quiet and Nobody Will Notice
There is one thing that ought to be taught in all the colleges, Which is that people ought to be taught not to go around always making apologies. I don’t mean the kind of
The Firefly
The firefly’s flame Is something for which science has no name I can think of nothing eerier Than flying around with an unidentified glow on a Person’s posteerier.
The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus
In Baltimore there lived a boy. He wasn’t anybody’s joy. Although his name was Jabez Dawes, His character was full of flaws. In school he never led his classes, He hid old ladies’ reading
A Caution To Everybody
Consider the auk; Becoming extinct because he forgot how to fly, and could only walk. Consider man, who may well become extinct Because he forgot how to walk and learned how to fly before
The Praying Mantis
From whence arrived the praying mantis? From outer space, or lost Atlantis? Glimpse the grin, green metal mug At masks the pseudo-saintly bug, Orthopterous, also carnivorous, And faintly whisper, Lord deliver us.